I was chatting with an old time friend, Catfish, earlier in the day. He msn-ed me about my enlistment stuff and shared a few thoughts and insight of it. One of the phrases that captured my attention, during our talks on how the leadership is during army, was: "Respect through care, not fear."

I really do agree with him. This really gives a whole new meaning of earning your respect from others. It's not to instill fear but to instill love. Similarly, I believe that's how God wants us to respect him and ourselves. People may proclaim about the 'hand of God' causing natural disasters and matters... however, if you really think about it... God is love, and if he so love the world to give his only begotten son to save us? Why torture us or kill us through such means? A punishment, some may say? But didn't his son took the punishment for us already?

I can feel the temperature rising in me these few days. It's not that I have a fever or flu but it's just temper. It seems that I can get worked up so easily for a moment, and it will take a longer time to cool down. I did ask myself what am I stress about? But there is none... so why? Perhaps, Wombat was right with his fear of me changing to a different Fish... from bad to worse, maybe? I don't know...

Watching the Hong Kong drama "Flaming Butterfly", I do fear a striking resemblance. Sometimes, when a couple do not move together in the same direction, priorities, aims, goals and other matters will defer. Ideas will clash, the give and take situation will vaporise... and well, fights will occur more often. Wolf, did mentioned to me about moving in the same direction to further understand each other. I guess the time is now. This is especially so when one is moving in the workforce or university, while the other is about to serve the nation.

How much will change? How much different in ideology will we be? How much can we give and take? And how tolerant can one be?

Both feared something. But how do we conquer this fear? How do we understand each other's needs when honesty and truthfulness among each other seems to be lesser and lesser?

I believe that as long as one of the couple doubt the other... the trust is broken. Building back a broken trust to how it was to be, is nearly an impossible task. There will always be that scar, that hurt, or that betrayal that will haunt the relationship for life. But I also do believe, that some couples do outlast this fact.

So whenever there seems to be a conflict, try to cool down and think for the other person. You may think too much, but at least if you express it to your partner... hopefully he or she knows that at least you did think about the relationship...

Good luck