So long for my sleepless activity thus far... I guess I can't really take too much of it or else I'll end up sleeping in the train and in the buses. Then, I'll really end up somewhere I do not know at all.

Anyway I've got this words coming to me again today. It's after reading one of my God-Sister's blog about telling or not telling the person you love that you actually do love him or her. And it further questions about your decision if you would regret one day or maybe, it was a better choice not to say. It's sad but it's true as well. So many times, humans curse and swear and hate themselves for not doing things that they are suppose to do. It's about choice.

Then I thought and saw something today. Saying about love and hate. How long can someone love something or hate something? An example, humans like to confess their love to their love ones by saying: "I'll love you, forever and ever!". Or when a human is frustrated with another and says: "I hate you, forever!".

It's weird after a few minutes, hours, day or moment, things will change. From love to hate and hate to love. It's like a cycle. A vicious cycle.

I'm so happy and sad at the moment. I'm happy she messaged me about matters, yet sad or more like jealous when it was about how to date a guy. I can hear those heart-breaks and shatters from within. Haha, well, it's her life. I'm happy she still response somehow. I guess by her response and knowing that she is so happy with her life, it satisfy my soul. Haha sounds wrong though, however, it's true. Ask my God-Sister Ms Lum about it! She knows me best.

Love... it's a distance thing for me. Never knew how a woman's love felt like ... for so long. Even since she went... nothing came. Well, one day, I pray she will send someone that she believe will be suitable for me. With the approval from the Father, of coz.

What's next for me... to settle all matters that needs to be settled before moving on to my next stage in life. That's like how Wolf explained to me. People have to move on to the next stage after completing matters regarding to the current stage.

Anyway I need to see a doctor soon. Haha my left shoulder is hurting again. Woke up this morning and I can't lift it up. I think I slept on it for the whole night. It sucks to have such incapability. Then I thought, if it ain't gonna get better and is hindering in my life... I've got to chop it off. Similarly, that led me to think, what are matters in my life that are hindering me and pulling me back... Scouting? working at fishy and at the bank? studying? or what else...

Yeah and to that dearest girl scout lynn... It's never a regrettable thing to maintain a relationship with fellow friends. What's regrettable is to give up on the relationship. It's like saying I give up even before the match began. What's more worse in life for humans? to give up or to lose and know you tried?

One life, live it well.